i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
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