dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
Randomize
