Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize
