why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
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