I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
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