dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
Randomize
