Nicole vs. Life
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
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