FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
Randomize
