everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
Dude, I totally just made my launch phrase on my new phone "Wingardium Leviosa" so that when people try it and it doesn't work I can say, "It's leveeOHsa, not leveeoh-SA."
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
Randomize
