I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
Randomize
