I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
This dudes playing guitar and singing outside our window and he's like "ravioli is beterrrrrrr than tortelliniIii cause tortelliniiii is shaped like fucking ears"
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
Randomize
