And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Randomize