oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
