wanna go halves on a baby?
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
Randomize
