Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
We need to get me chipped asap
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Randomize
