Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Randomize
