We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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