And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
