I can't watch pbs sober anymore
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
Naked. naked and bneed help.
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
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