somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
Randomize
