At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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