dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Randomize
