smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
Randomize
