when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
Randomize
