none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
I woke up at 11 this morning in my car parked in front of the bar.
I know, I tried to wake you up, but I couldnt. So I walked home
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
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