On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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