3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
Randomize
