you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Randomize
