Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
Randomize
