belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
Randomize
