If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
I woke up with a black eye and dim memories of announcing that i had super powers. I shoved my pockets full of canned tuna and tried to jump off the balcony. And then my boyfriend called the cops.
so you're not coming in to work today?
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
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