"it" just moved
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
Randomize
