Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize
