i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
