Just mADE A PArabola og urine
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
Randomize
