The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
no, he came in my armpit
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
Randomize
