Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
I like to think it a success when the cops are called
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
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