I want to stick my p in your. b.
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
Randomize
