No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
Randomize
