Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
Randomize
