Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
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