I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
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