why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Randomize
