hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
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