It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize