I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
