I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
