Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
Randomize
