That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
Randomize
