Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
My fire has petered out without you
My Peter has fired out without you
That might be the most romantic thing you’ve said to me, unfortunately.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
