the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Randomize
